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 Post subject: First Reactios to "tools" yeah, TOOLS is right.....
PostPosted: Fri Feb 24, 2012 6:59 am 
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I came here out of curiosity. this is NOT a "politically correct" posting, and
I make NO apologies, just giving fair warning. If you can't handle anger (and almost
no women can, it seems) then move on now...


I can't afford any treatment, and very much doubt any would work. I am self diagnosed with BPD, I drink like crazy, been diagnosed many things, originally Clinical Depression. Taken so many pills I can't remember most of the names, they're all pretty much crap. A few made me feel fantastic for about five days (after waiting two weeks for them to kick in) then after five days.....back to feeling like crap again. Docs give out pills like crazy. Up the dose, add a mood stabilizer, try another one....fuck that shit, it's a scam. Read Dr. Breggin for yourself.

My health is horrible and I can't deal with government (or anyone) without losing my temper....can't get the help I am legally entitled to, because all those hacks care aobut is filling in paperwork and collecting a paycheck, not getting me what I need.
Thank god I got onto Social Security Disability, but now I need hernia surgery, and alots of dental work. I live alone, addicted to internet porn and computer games. Can't go out....too dangerous that I'd get arrested. Lonely, until I do go out, and rediscover what incredibly naive/stupid losers people are, how intolerant and shallow they all are.

Lots of swearing and anger to follow, so if
you're too mentally constipated to handle that, move on and don't read this:


BE IMPECCABLE WITH YOUR WORD

Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.

Truth and love are often, perhaps even
usually, utterly incompatible. Every woman I've
ever had a relationship with CLAIMED to value
truth above everything else.....yet not a single one of them actually wanted to know the real truth, about ANYthing, ever.
On the contrary, they very much preferred to
be reassured and lied to....that way, I was forced to tell them what they wanted to hear, but they
could feel self-rightous when the truth finally
emerged.
The truth is an ugly, ugly business, and few
have the stamina to endure it. I sure don't. I lie to myself constantly.

DON'T TAKE ANYTHING PERSONALLY

Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won't be the victim of needless suffering.

This is so stupid, I don't even know where to begin. Oh, no one mocks or insults you because YOU dared to ask a question, revealing your inexperience and lack of competence? Sure, rationalize it....they're just projecting, right? It's all hostility from something that happened to them, it's not about you at all. Well, fuck that bullshit. I don't CARE if the "real" reason they're being a prick is somehow "not me", because I am the actual, factual target and victim. Yeah, be immune to the actions of others. Let them punch you, insult you, spit on you, steal from you, mock you. It's not about you....only YOU can make yourself a victim, right? I'd like to STAB the asshole who wrote this in the face, and say, "Oh, it's okay, because you're immune to the actions of others, right? You don't choose to be a victim!" What as load of horseshit this is.
There ARE actual sadistic evil fucks in the world, and they ARE actively and eagerly seeking out people to harm, and it IS personal.

DON'T MAKE ASSUMPTIONS

Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.

Yeah, because that always works out great.
Asking questions does not make you look weak, stupid, incompetent or worthless at ALL....no one will ever laugh at you or insult you. Riiiiiight. Did you not ever go to high school, college or to work?

Yeah, express what you really want, because women LOVE hearing that all you really want is a blowjob and to go to sleep. Oh boy, my life has been transfomed by this statement....yeah, transformed into being in a room with a screaming bitch throwing things, and I won't be getting any sleep and will feel like crap at work tomorrow....

ALWAYS DO YOUR BEST

Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse and regret.

Yeah, just do your best. Never mind that your best is not good enough. Never mind that your girlfriend walks out, you get fired from your job, that your friends betray you....you're not a loser
because you did your BEST. How fucking stupid can you be? "Do your best"? What are, we, four years old? Are YOU going to pay my rent after "my best" gets me fired? Are YOU going to get me laid after "my best" has girls in a bar laughing in my face and rejecting me?
Get fucking serious.


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 Post subject: Re: First Reactios to "tools" yeah, TOOLS is right.....
PostPosted: Thu Mar 01, 2012 9:25 am 
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Bearcat,

Wow! Sorry you are having such trouble gettting help. I don't consider myself to be "mentally constipated" so bring it on, Bearcat, ha,ha. It sounds like you are having a very difficult time getting help for your physical problems as well as for your self-diagnosed bpd. I can well understand why you feel as you do, I really do. Being physically uncomfortable only adds to the emotional stuff. Life can be difficult in the best of times. You need some relief and help with both.

I just hope you can get some help for your emotional problems, at least at this site. Hope you stay with us....lots of good people here who've experienced much of what you're going through.

Peace, Bearcat


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 Post subject: Re: First Reactios to "tools" yeah, TOOLS is right.....
PostPosted: Fri Mar 02, 2012 7:23 am 
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Thank you, dagwood, for your kind words.

I am constantly amazed that no one besides me
gets angry or resentful over this sort of thing.

All my life I've been hearing "You're the only one complaining"
as if that somehow made what I was saying untrue!
You can change the truth by bullying the messenger...but, boy oh boy do people keep trying that on me.

You can write down any bunch of gibberish you want, logical or not,
and, statistically, "it's working for some people". Yes, because SOME
people are going to get well on their own, that's just a matter of the law of averages. It doesn't make these so-called tools valid.

I don't think anyone is going to bully me here. That isn't what I'm saying. I'm just saying that the illogic of these "tools" in the sidebar is insulting to our intelligence.

Just Say Know. (copyright 2012)


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 Post subject: Re: First Reactios to "tools" yeah, TOOLS is right.....
PostPosted: Fri Mar 02, 2012 7:51 am 
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bearcat22 wrote:
T
You can change the truth by bullying the messenger...but, boy oh boy do people keep trying that on me.


Ooops. Typo. "can't"


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 Post subject: Re: First Reactios to "tools" yeah, TOOLS is right.....
PostPosted: Fri Mar 02, 2012 8:30 am 
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I think the suggestions, especially the 10 twisted ways of thinking, are me! How odd I didn't realize it all these years. Thinking that other people thought as I did only complicated my life. I have discovered the reason for my life issues that have caused me such problems and this site contains some great tips on uncovering the real me! Thanks everyone for your input! These tools are for BPD's and are not always what we want but are what we need to like ourselves and others in a sane way.
Mike

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 Post subject: Re: First Reactios to "tools" yeah, TOOLS is right.....
PostPosted: Fri Mar 02, 2012 11:24 am 
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MickBur,

I agree

dagwood


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 Post subject: Re: First Reactios to "tools" yeah, TOOLS is right.....
PostPosted: Fri Mar 02, 2012 1:53 pm 
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BearCat,

I can well understand how you feel when people disregard what you say when expressing your feelings. Trying to tell people how I felt, and how unhappy I was was a lost cause....people just couldn't understand why I felt that way which really sent me into a tissy,ha,ha. I felt so alone and at times desperate. I was hospitalized 5 times back in the 70's, but the last time was at a long-term facility where I got the most help. There were many thought processes and behaviors that I had a hard time understanding and accepting. Once I gained more knowledge about bpd, it made more sense. The thing was I also realized that this was work I had to do myself. It took me a long time to be willing to do that work, though. Once I got a computer I started doing research, I bought books on the subject....some books were written for professionals, so I felt like I was sort of eavesdropping a bit, ha,ha. Then I found this site, and just finding others who have experienced the same problems was wonderful. Guess there is no miracle cure for bpd, but it is possible to have a good life with love and happiness....If you have the determination to get well, you can do it.

dagwood


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 Post subject: Re: First Reactios to "tools" yeah, TOOLS is right.....
PostPosted: Tue Apr 03, 2012 5:42 am 
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Have you read the book?

I *ahem* downloaded an audio version for free.

I actually liked the book. It was a bit wishy washy with it's "you are a magician with words" crap but I guess that's just an analogy. It actually makes some good points. It had me partially won over by the first chapter being about how fucked up the world is.

It's main points are really about taking care of yourself and treating yourself properly rather than blaming yourself all the time and learning to accept that when people are ignorant and intolerant that it really is their problem and nothing to do with you.

I can't apply any of it to my real life because I'm totally fucked and dysfunctional but maybe after a while in treatment if things are going a bit better I might find it easier.

Just don't write it off as total bullshit, without reading it. The small explanations are easily misunderstood. I don't think you've understood them the way the author intended.

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 Post subject: Re: First Reactios to "tools" yeah, TOOLS is right.....
PostPosted: Tue Apr 03, 2012 4:47 pm 
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BearCat, you certainly wear your armor of anger quite effectively. Is it to see if people are worthy enough? Do you purposely put that anger out-front as a defense sheild to test those who might try to help you? If they make it through, then they must care ... only to be tested and tested and tested more until they cave, walking away to save themselves and you've proven to yourself that no one could possibly ever mean a genuine kind thing & that no one is ever worthy of esteem in your eyes?

How's that working out for you?

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 Post subject: Re: First Reactios to "tools" yeah, TOOLS is right.....
PostPosted: Tue Apr 03, 2012 4:49 pm 
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By the way ...

BearCat wrote:
Asking questions does not make you look weak, stupid, incompetent or worthless at ALL....


So how weak, stupid, incompetent and worthless do I come across with my questions?

And yes, I'm being intentionally quite a bitch. You give off anger, so meek, mild and tippy-toe respectful ain't gonna cut shit with you. I've met your type before. You want hard as nails, buddy - you've got it.

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