Home  •  FAQ  •   Forums

It is currently Tue Oct 16, 2018 5:26 pm

All times are UTC - 7 hours [ DST ]




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 9 posts ] 
Author Message
 Post subject: Coming back to the tools....
PostPosted: Tue Jun 03, 2008 11:31 am 
New Member
New Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Jul 31, 2006 6:00 pm
Posts: 103
Location: NY
Stop / HALT
Hungry -- there's pineapple & pasta salad
Angry -- a little at myself for not miraculously having a job & health insurance
Lonely -- well, yeah!
Tired -- extremely, I'm on Bennedryl
& Scared -- about the threat of prison from the credit card company
(Remember that these feelings are only temporary)

Determine what the problem is
How much of where I am in life right now is my fault? Is there fault? Can I do anything about $ right now?

Come up with THREE possible courses of action
1. eat & call DSS + lawyer > get kiddo & play outside > create daycare flier tonight
2. call DSS & lawyer > get kiddo & eat > make the daycare flier tonight
3. eat & make a list of tasks > get kiddo & play ... call DSS & lawyer while kiddo plays outside, then eat & play inside ... figure out daycare flier & maybe visit DSS + lawyer tomorrow

Figure out which one is best for now
I'm gonna make a list. I'll probably be anal enough to cut the list into strips & tape them in a better order on a new piece of paper. Hey, it helps me stick to what needs to be done. Even if I do end up changing the order around again.

_________________
ImageImage


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Coming back to the tools....
PostPosted: Wed Jun 25, 2008 5:28 pm 
Senior Community Leader
Senior Community Leader
User avatar

Joined: Mon Aug 22, 2005 6:00 pm
Posts: 1613
Location: The Carolinas
Hey, I just saw this. How did it go? And btw, I'm having CC issues, too. From what I've read, that prison threat is just that... a threat. I've been told it's considered a civil matter if you're not paying your credit cards. If I'm wrong, I hope someone can correct me... and soon, cuz Capital One is on my ass. ;)

_________________
As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live. -- Goethe


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Coming back to the tools....
PostPosted: Thu Jun 26, 2008 5:06 pm 
Community Member
Community Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Nov 28, 2005 6:00 pm
Posts: 1800
Location: texas
Trinity i have been on a credit board a long time, it got shut down by some CAs. however, give me your state or i can send yall a link to a great, trusted site. or look upi your own laws in your state.

i will say this, i have learned one can not go to prison. cap 1 is one i had to get charged off, they seldom sue and you need to know your SOL for your state. in texas, it is 4 years.

plus i know lots of the tricks CAs will say and you wont know until its too late how it really works.

i also know how they must sue you, and what you can do to answer, inside SOL. its online, if you know how to look.

personally, i loved the guy who told me to sell the tv he heard in the background and pay them the money. rofl. sure.

if the collection agency, "CA" uses these type threats, it is against federal law.

just let me know if you want me to tell ya some of this, since it isnt on topic for the board itself.

_________________
"no one can walk on you unless you lay down first"
-old saying-


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Coming back to the tools....
PostPosted: Thu Jun 26, 2008 5:10 pm 
Community Member
Community Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Nov 28, 2005 6:00 pm
Posts: 1800
Location: texas
in light of the above, yes i have web sites. yes, i have used my previous experience to learn this.

its also quite good to get a tape recorder when a CA calls, if you feel you must answer. they wont let you tape them, its a great way in court to win a 5,000$ suit in small claims. of course you tell them you are taping!

lots of small things most consumers dont know about their rights. educate!

things a CA can do, within the law and how to watch out for it.

things they cant, and how to deal with that.

this can all be backed up by law online which varies by state. because i have lived thru this, i kept the info on my computer that i learned.

_________________
"no one can walk on you unless you lay down first"
-old saying-


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Coming back to the tools....
PostPosted: Thu Sep 04, 2008 12:25 pm 
New Member
New Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Jul 31, 2006 6:00 pm
Posts: 103
Location: NY
Well, how's this for BPD symptoms -- I had no idea I posted this thread.... :loco :shrug

Since I posted this, I got a scholarship & grant which covered the cost: they agreed to give me a "discount" for 1/2 the final amount (which was closer to the actual amount I spent)

_________________
ImageImage


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Coming back to the tools....
PostPosted: Tue Sep 09, 2008 3:59 pm 
Senior Community Leader
Senior Community Leader
User avatar

Joined: Mon Aug 22, 2005 6:00 pm
Posts: 1613
Location: The Carolinas
That's great! Good job. :)

_________________
As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live. -- Goethe


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Coming back to the tools....
PostPosted: Sun Sep 14, 2008 11:29 am 
New Member
New Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Jul 31, 2006 6:00 pm
Posts: 103
Location: NY
Thanks, Trinity :kiss I'm still getting a defaul judgment against me on the home foreclosure & a few other (very small) amounts reported to collection agencies, but it does feel good to know I was able to resolve this one at least :whew Just have to remember to keep reminding myself of when I do well....

_________________
ImageImage


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Coming back to the tools....
PostPosted: Fri Sep 19, 2008 8:34 pm 
Senior Community Leader
Senior Community Leader
User avatar

Joined: Mon Aug 22, 2005 6:00 pm
Posts: 1613
Location: The Carolinas
I'm sorry to hear that. I was able to work out a loan modification with our mortgage company. I worked with a company called Hope Now. I was able to get my past due mortgage payments forgiven and was given a lower interest rate and lower (affordable) monthly payment. Life can throw you curve balls, but there is help out there. I've also worked out deals with most of my credit card companies. The only one who wouldn't come down on their monthly payment was Captital One, so I'm going to have to deal with a charge off on my credit report from them. I just keep reminding myself a lot of folks are going through this and it's not the end of the world.

_________________
As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live. -- Goethe


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Coming back to the tools....
PostPosted: Sat Sep 20, 2008 1:48 pm 
New Member
New Member
User avatar

Joined: Sat Jul 19, 2008 6:36 pm
Posts: 93
It really is a hard time for a lot of us right now financially. We are 6 months behind on our house payment, and it has been a tense subject between me and my S.O.- and easy trigger for her ptsd, and my bpd. we know that when we are united, monitor our own stress levels-and say Stop when it is time to stop talking about our truly abysmal finances, that we find the way Together.

Thanks for the info on hope now- i thought they were just "do nothings" until you get caught up- yeah right like we are Ever going to get caught up...i jumped through a ton of hoops and spent many hours working with a group that said they would help us get caught up on our back payments- only to find out that they neglected to mention that we had to be "viable"-ie able to make payments. which we are not- we need a loan modification, but the bank says they won't even Look at that unless we get caught up- and round and round it goes.

the credit card people have actually been ok- they call religiously every 5 days- all day long till i pick up the phone- i have gotten less intimidated by or affected in a bpd way by talking to them, and found that if it goes on long enough, they will Finally consider you for the "hardship" program, lower your rate , eliminate fees, etc. For me it is about sheltering my sweet 9 yo baby boy from this reality- so i tell him we are on a tight budget right now because all our money is tied up in investments, and that we have enough to live on, and need to learn to make good spending choices, because money saved grows, etc etc etc- trying to not worry him, and pass on good financial advise that i could have used- a big stretch of the truth, but i'm sure God forgives me that. and it is true enough that I am not messing with my son's reality meter. He knows i haven't worked in over a year, my S.O. in over 2 due to disability- and he knows that his needs are met, and my always smart shopping got smarter.

luckily, I am going back to school- starting monday, and we are awaiting my financial aid which should help. for me it is about faith and works- trust that we will be ok, and do the work that needs to be done in managable chunks, using tools to manage my anxiety. I have had weeks where i needed to deal with So Many phone calls, and bill payments that the Only way I could keep from going into a full on panic attack was to slowly and carefully seperate everything into little stacks for each day, and rubber band each stack-which was an important step - it made it Clear that i did not need to even Think about Any of the stacks Except the one for the day. Hard week, but I made it through.

good luck and God Bless to all Y'all dealing with this nightmare on top of our mental health issues.

_________________
As Gloria Gaynor sez "I will survive" and no longer choose a name like sadgirl66, I am becoming happyhealinggirl66.


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 9 posts ] 

All times are UTC - 7 hours [ DST ]


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 4 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum

Jump to:  
cron
Powered by phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group