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 Post subject: internal change and postive self-talk
PostPosted: Tue Jul 22, 2008 5:45 pm 
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So, after dealing with some stuff related to a certain person (the specifics aren't relevant here, as that's not the topic), that part of me that I've been calling the little girl part, or just Little Girl, piped in with, "I'm not worthy of him".

But (first cool thing), there was something different. That part felt different. There wasn't a feeling of being a little girl. More an ageless feeling. That is, no sense of age at all. Or maybe a youngness and a grown-up-ness at the same time. Which I thought was pretty cool. :)

And, there was also a difference when I used self talk to answer that "not worthy" thought. It wasn't the adult me talking to Little Girl. It was self talk within that same part of me. Which I'm now calling the inner me.

I think the "not worthy" thought, it wasn't something I (or that part of me) really believed anymore, but an automatic negative thought (link). And I needed to counter it.

So, cool to see that change inside of me. And the self talk was definitely helpful. Had I not countered it with the truth ("I am worthy of him") I could have gotten quite down on myself. Or at least in a little rut. But I didn't. :)

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 Post subject: Re: internal change and postive self-talk
PostPosted: Tue Jul 22, 2008 7:36 pm 
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How very very cool !!!

Just reading this gives me a very good feeling; one of comfort and satisfaction- (for the growing you've done).

To say it wasn't another part of you(the adult) but rather the same part... nice !!

I appreciate, very much, you sharing your experience. You've done this a number of times before and it is the type of thing that helps me see how I can approach difficult situations.

Sounds like you spend a lot of time analyzing your situations and looking at other approaches which gives you these great bursts of progress. Love it !


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 Post subject: Re: internal change and postive self-talk
PostPosted: Wed Jul 23, 2008 10:41 am 
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smilininside wrote:
Sounds like you spend a lot of time analyzing your situations and looking at other approaches which gives you these great bursts of progress. Love it !


Hm. I'm not sure if that's true or not, but it's not how I see it. As I see it, I try to deal with the stuff in my life as it comes up, to face it and not run away. And this here, that I was talking about, not much time spent in doing it.

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 Post subject: Re: internal change and postive self-talk
PostPosted: Thu Jul 24, 2008 8:39 am 
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My T has challenged me to have 5 examples where I have stopped that automatic negative thought pattern and change how I respond to what I perceive as a up coming bad situation. We have spent weeks dissecting past situations. If time has passed since the situation I am pretty good at seeing the negative thought and an optional response or behavior. But if the situation is fresh and still sensitive I can not for the life of let go of the negative thinking and every argument he has against it, I have another negative thought to replace it. Seems that when I am triggered it is not one thought but a barrage of negative thoughts.

I sit here and have no idea how to stop myself from reacting badly. 5 examples of when I changed 43 years of conditioning... I have 3 examples where I could have done that... if I saw it happening at the time.

How do you identify when you need to stop and think or act differently? Seems things aways blow up so fast in my world. Any advise?


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