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 Post subject: knowing how to deal with feelings
PostPosted: Wed Jun 03, 2009 6:50 am 
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A relationship that used to cause me to have feelings that I didn't know how to deal with, it still causes strong feelings, but I know how to deal with them. Which is so nice. :)

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 Post subject: Re: knowing how to deal with feelings
PostPosted: Wed Jun 03, 2009 11:53 am 
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I'm glad you are in a nice place with this issue, Ellen. Way to go! :disco :groove

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 Post subject: Re: knowing how to deal with feelings
PostPosted: Wed Jun 03, 2009 1:13 pm 
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Yeah!!! I'm happy for you!


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 Post subject: Re: knowing how to deal with feelings
PostPosted: Wed Jun 03, 2009 2:28 pm 
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Ellen, that is soooo great! I hope someday to be at the point where you are. Well, actually, it'd be nice to not have those feelings at all to have to deal with, but that's life right? You are doing awesome and many congrats!!!


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 Post subject: Re: knowing how to deal with feelings
PostPosted: Wed Jun 03, 2009 4:35 pm 
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That's great Ellen! BTW - could you tell me how to deal with them? Five months after the breakup and I still can't think of C without balling. lol.

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 Post subject: Re: knowing how to deal with feelings
PostPosted: Thu Jun 04, 2009 4:31 pm 
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I'm happy for you, Ellen. I know you've been working on this for a long time. :)


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 Post subject: Re: knowing how to deal with feelings
PostPosted: Fri Jun 05, 2009 6:29 am 
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Thanks, everyone.

BPDpip5, my first inclination was to answer your question no. Which is true. I can't tell someone else how to deal with their feelings. But I can make an attempt to say something about how I deal with mine. Unfortunately, I don't have time right now. I'll try to remember to do so this weekend.

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 Post subject: Re: knowing how to deal with feelings
PostPosted: Sat Jun 06, 2009 12:05 pm 
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Key word in the above post... attempt.

Well, a big part of it is having worked through a lot of the issues. Both stuff he triggered that didn't have to do with him, and stuff related to him. And understanding the relationship and what my boundaries are. Which was a huge task. And doing that did help me practice the skills that I still use. As have other relationships.

A lot of using the tools and similiar thinking strategies to get to this point.

Mostly, accepting my feelings, and correcting twisted thinking related to those feelings. And learning to not overfocus on what I don't have, but to see and appreciate what I do have.

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