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 Post subject: confused and unsure
PostPosted: Mon Sep 01, 2008 1:53 pm 
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Joined: Mon Sep 01, 2008 1:52 pm
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I'm tentatively posting on here...

Over the few years, its become apparent that I seem to have real issues with my temper. I lose it over the tiniest things- and while some of these may be justified, I don't think the extent to which I do is correct. I can see that.

It seems to go in cycles of low-irritable mood, but sometimes many times within a day. And extreme anger, to upset and happiness within a few hours. Its really tiring. I'm convinced that people do things just to piss me off, I CAN be paranoid, but that too can come and go. Sometimes I feel like things aren't real, even though I'm sitting up and awake and talking. In fact, I KNOW that all these things that people are doing to piss me off and upset me can't be right. But I still can't do anything but fly off the handle.

I get really upset when I feel like people are excluding me and leaving me out- half they time they aren't. But I still feel it, lose my temper and then send text messages breaking all contact or telling them all how horrible they are. I'm stuck between blaming myself COMPLETELY or blaming them COMPLETELY. I don't like people leaving me, I get really upset, and then very angry when i feel i've been left.

I was presented with a print out of "feelings that may indicate BPD" and suddenly realised that that is my life.

Am I doomed for the rest of my life? What should I do next?


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 Post subject: Re: confused and unsure
PostPosted: Tue Sep 02, 2008 6:09 am 
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Joined: Thu Dec 01, 2005 6:00 pm
Posts: 1059
Hi confused -

Welcome to BPDR. I'm glad you found us.

Unfortunately we can't really tell you if you have BPD or not, as we aren't mental health professionals and it would be unethical for anybody here to diagnose you. The best thing for you to do would be to see a psychiatrist to talk over your problems, though I know that in the UK it's often a difficult and prolonged process to get that referral and that must be very frustrating.

Anger, irritability, and rapidly changing moods can certainly be part of BPD, but there is generally more to it as well. Have you checked out the DSM-IV criteria (found here)? You're supposed to have at least 5 of the 9 criteria for diagnosis -- those who have less are just considered to have "traits." There's other good information on the main page, too -- you can get there, if you haven't already, by clicking on the way top left of the page where it says "happy, healthy living" and "bpdrecovery.com."

Also check out our "tools" in the box on the left. A lot of us use them to help sort things out when our thoughts or actions take us astray. For instance, you could use the "Ten Forms of Twisted Thinking" to figure out some ways that unhealthy thought processes might be leading to your anger response, and then "untwist" them. And you can use The Five Steps to come up with alternative ways to deal with problems that frustrate you, that maybe would be more effective than an outburst of anger.

Feel welcome to stick around and read in the different forums -- maybe you'll find some situations that ring some bells with you and give you some insight into what's going on.

Good luck -- I hope we'll "see" more of you here.

_________________
I made some studies, and reality is the leading cause of stress amongst those in touch with it.
I can take it in small doses, but as a lifestyle I found it too confining. -- Jane Wagner


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