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 Post subject: Hi
PostPosted: Sun Jan 02, 2011 6:08 pm 
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I am actually a recovering borderline who can see things easily in gray and no longer have a lot of the problems I once did when I was younger. I just left a relationship with a borderline that was pretty intense-- typical idealization in the beginning (from me too-- I mirrored right back, unfortunately), and devaluation at the end (from him, not me). I am interested in learning more about BPD in general and hoping to find some support from nons and borderlines alike. I am still in contact with my ex and it's still very painful to be apart from him, but I could't handle his rages and devaluation cycles anymore. I am also very aware that being with him raised some very real borderline issues for me, and I need to reevaluate myself and my approach to the world.

I guess that's it. My ex so far has rejected any notions that what he did was wrong or inappropriate. He welcomed my observations in the beginning but now that I've been caught up in the devaluation cycle he won't listen to me. I know he's scared and he hates himself sometimes, and I feel tremendous empathy for him. I would still be with him if he would have agreed to work on this with me.

So I'm here to learn, for my own sake. I have a lot of "waifish" issues that I must attend to.

Grimalkin


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 Post subject: Re: Hi
PostPosted: Mon Jan 03, 2011 1:20 am 
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"waifish" issues? What's that?

Wow you have such clarity about things, I admire that.


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 Post subject: Re: Hi
PostPosted: Mon Jan 03, 2011 5:27 am 
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meremortal wrote:
"waifish" issues? What's that?

Wow you have such clarity about things, I admire that.


"Waifish" meaning I have codependency issues and tend to be (at least at the moment) somewhat low functioning, acting in. It's due to a few issues, not just the breakup. I need to work on these things.

Thank you. I've had three months to research BPD and think about the relationship. Believe me, I had anything but clarity when we first broke up.

Grim


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 Post subject: Re: Hi
PostPosted: Wed Jan 05, 2011 10:37 pm 
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welcome. I know just how you feel. I am going through similar.

surreal


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 Post subject: Re: Hi
PostPosted: Wed Jan 05, 2011 10:49 pm 
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thanks for clarifying.

Happy attending to those issues! :)


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