BPDRecovery.com: Forums

Hi. I'm new to this forum. I was diagnosed back in 1996 with BPD. I went through all kinds of therapy and pills. The last few years I haven't really thought much about my BPD until recently. Recently because my entire life blew up in my face. I'm hoping by being here I can find the answers I need to get my life back to normal. I thought I had a handle on things but I was wrong. My forum name is switik791. That will do for now til I get to know everyone better.

Hey switik! Welcome to the forum!

You seem like someone I could learn a lot from, but so are many of the people here. I hope you find a way to get past your setback. Good luck!

Thank you Bewilderness. I will share what I can. All I know right now is this latest episode with BPD has cost me dearly and I'm still trying to get it all figured out in my head.

I know the feeling. Maybe if you share a little bit more about what happened it will help you figure things out?

Well the main part of it is mostly that my wife and I were working on getting back together and working things out as we were heading for divorce. Currently I am in one state and she is in another. The main part of BPD is trust issues and one time we were talking and she was getting ready to go out with friends and I made some comment about not picking up any guys. She had already promised prior to that about not seeking out anyone else. Needless to say she got upset. My bpd was already rearing its ugly head already before that conversation. The next day the wife wouldn't talk to me and by now the bpd was in full gear. I left several emails and voicemails saying all kinds of crap I knew wasn't true and at this point my marriage is more than over. The thing is, My wife was my best friend prior to us getting married. I systematically killed my marriage and very seriously hurt that friendship too. Like I said, my life blew up in my face. I need to seriously get this BPD under control.

I'm sorry to hear about all that, switik. Sounds like a pretty major setback. I hope everything works out for you.

What was different about before? How would you have handled that situation and those feelings when you had your BPD under control?

Just something to think about.

Yes Bewilderness, that is one thing I have thought a lot about was how I would have handled it in the past and how I should have handled it now. Plain and simple: I screwed up big time. I let my BPD control me instead of me controlling it. They say we learn from our mistakes. I have learned a harsh lesson. I am now gaining back my control and will do whatever it takes. Thank you for pointing that out in your last post. It was staring me in the face the whole time and if it had been a snake it would have bit me. Thanks again. And let the healing begin.

yeah let the healing begin!