BPDRecovery.com: Forums

This is kind of awkward for me because I'm really not sure what to think about BPD. I exhibit many of the twisted ways of thinking, but I've heard that men with BPD generally exhibit more of a habit of anger. While I used to hurt myself in fits of anger that I later felt shame over, I have since had fewer and fewer angry responses. (Outside of driving)

I usually try not to share my emotions for fear of judgment, but, after reading the tools available on this site, I feel like this might actually be a healthy start for me.

Hi there, and welcome.

Don't worry too much about stereotypes of what men are supposed to be like or what women are supposed to be like or about whether "everybody" is this or that or another thing. There are nine (I think) criteria for BPD in the last DSM, and a person is considered to have the disorder if they have five of them. But there are several hundred permutations of five out of nine. And some people have more than five, and some have fewer, in which case they are considered to have "traits" of BPD rather than the full-blown disorder. Maybe more men than women are considered "angry" but many women who have passed through this board have admitted to all sorts of physical acting out and violence, against both themselves and others.

The tools can be really helpful if you're willing to really practice them. If you have questions or comments, don't hesitate to jump in.

I'm also a new arrivee to BDP and this site.
I am also in shock and confusion (relief, denial, shame, to name but a few).

I would say: don't worry about the label or whether you fully/partially/barely fit the complex criteria. This was a confusion for me because:
- who is to say whether my poor-self image is simply reality? ;-)
- I mainly 'exhibit' via anger bursts
- The 'catalysts' for such episodes have gradually diminished over the course of my 30 adults years

However, the potential still remains:
- to explode (as evidenced recently :-(
- to improve

So forget the labels and embrace the acceptance that there is something that can be improved.
The Four Divisions of BDP (chapter somewhere in the tools) was great for me. Simple 'labels'.