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 Post subject: misrepresenting who we are
PostPosted: Tue Feb 21, 2012 11:47 am 
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Joined: Fri Feb 17, 2012 7:21 am
Posts: 52
Hi, My name is Mike. I am 60 years young. It has only been recently that I have been diagnosed as BPD. My early teen years through my middle 20's were a nightmare. I knew something was very wrong with me mentally. I tried my best to drink and drug my way to sanity. I really only wanted to feel normal. While intoxicated I felt better but still removed from reality and a sense of who I was. I could not connect with the person I saw in the mirror and was scared. I had my 1st panic attack at 18. Thought I was having a heart attack. I suffered with these for years. They kept me out of college and into loneliness, alcohol and promiscuity. I never really had a "friend" because not knowing who I was I couldn't actually be much of a friend to anyone. My BPD has settled down quite a bit now that I am 60. I take Prozac and Inderal for panic and GAD and they help. I am glad I know now what was causing me so much trouble in my youth. I was mentally ill and suffering a lot of fear and loneliness. I still am discovering the "real" me and it started by accepting my illness and myself and going forward. I also SI but have not in a while. Learning slowly to accept and like me. I enjoy this forum for I feel that I am not alone and can express my illness to folk who understand.
Mike

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Coming out of the darkness!


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 Post subject: Re: misrepresenting who we are
PostPosted: Tue Feb 21, 2012 9:25 pm 
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Joined: Wed Jul 28, 2010 3:01 am
Posts: 1007
hey mike

welcome :)


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 Post subject: Re: misrepresenting who we are
PostPosted: Wed Feb 22, 2012 9:34 pm 
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Joined: Tue Feb 21, 2012 9:02 am
Posts: 6
Hi, Mike. My name is David, 55. Just discovered BPD after 15 years of thing to be bipolar. Just didn't fit the mold, and that's all the pros had to say about it, at least here in Arima. Glad to know there are doctos that recognize it. I am very encouraged with what I have read about CBT. I live with my wife of 37 years, who I have treated horribly despite my best, best intentions, an d my deep love for her. I drove her to have a sexual affair that's lasted over a year. Needless to say, I had a meltdown , several, actually, and it is in dealing with my overwhelming grief that I came to this topic and site. We are not splitting up over it, but making every effort to grow together. But I feel like I have found my tribe, finally, here. I don't have any male (or female, for that matter) friends at all. ing debut. h


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