BPDRecovery.com: Forums

I originally came to this site because a friend of mine has BPD, but after reading through the diagnostic criteria, nearly everyone fits, but I have just assumed I have those symptomns because of my depression. So what is the real difference between severe depression and BPD?

i would think the causes, altho i dont really know.

depression is a chemical imbalance in the brain. BPD is a personality disorder and has to do with the way we view the world, and respond to it.

i dont think they manifest in the same ways...altho depression can be part of bpd, i guess bpd can be part of depression. but i would think other ways they will be quite different.

depression is more like,,,too much or no eating, sleeping, interest in life. feelings of sadness, hopelessness, etc. it feels like a gray sheet is over everything and we cant pull it off.

bpd is how someone responds to life. to relationships. ingrained unhealthy thoughts and responses.

could you be more specific in what you mean? i dont see the dx criteria as being the same at all.

Hi, sweetersong ~

First off, it should be noted that almost everyone experiences some or all of the clinical criteria for BPD to a certain extent. One would have to have pervasive, severe symptoms - at least five of the nine stated in the DSM - to be dx'ed with the disorder. And I'm thinking it's pretty likely that anyone with BPD could experience severe depression, 'though it doesn't necessarily go the other way around [those with severe depression don't necessarily have BPD].

Differences between the two... ?
Well, it seems a large factor with BPD is an unhealthy measure of self-loathing and a debilitating fear of abandonment, both of which may manifest in reflexive sabotaging vis a vie relationships.

Impulsivity cruelly rules the [unaware] BPD-sufferer. There's a tendency to react quickly, emotionally, extremely... on beliefs more often than not based on feelings rather than intellect or fact.

Maybe it might help to hear that another 'label' the mental health folks are kicking around to replace the misnomer Borderline Personality Disorder is "Emotional Dysregulation Disorder".


You want to say why you see some of the criteria in yourself, sweeter?

~ jr

Ok, will try and explain myself a bit better, I will go through the criteria from this site, giving my own responses and feelings

frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment-I always try and make sure I am with someone, I hate my own company, and get very anxious if I am on my own. This links in to the 2nd one, but if me and my husband ever argue, I automatically think "he is going to leave me"

a pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterized by alternating between extremes of idealization and devaluation-Sometimes I feel really "it", but other times I think about how I am no good. My husband tries to reassure me he loves me, but I think of myself as no good, of no worth, and a rubbish wife, and house keeper

identity disturbance: markedly and persistently unstable self-image or sense of self - Have had really klow self esteem for as long as I can remember

impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging (e.g., spending, sex, substance abuse, reckless driving, binge eating)-Overspending, getting myself into debt-check, binge eating-check

recurrent suicidal behavior, gestures, or threats, or self-mutilating behavior -self harm, yes

affective instability due to a marked reactivity of mood (e.g., intense episodic dysphoria, irritability, or anxiety usually lasting a few hours and only rarely more than a few days) -I suffer with terrbile anxiety and stress, and they usually trigger physical symptomns (dizziness etc)

chronic feelings of emptiness -Yes, feel like this I'd say 90% of the time

inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger (e.g., frequent displays of temper, constant anger, recurrent physical fights) -Not as much now I am on effexor, but before this yes, and if I miss more than a couple of tablets then yes. Before I started this med, if I got angry at home, I would punch the bed, the walls etc, scream shot , It was horrbile

Unsure what the last one meansm but I think you probably get the point now

Well, sweetersong - I'm thinking this (from this site's FAQ):

"No one at BPDR can tell you whether or not you have BPD. Ideally, you should seek the advice and counsel of a competent, licensed mental health professional to discuss your symptoms and/or issues. If you feel you might have BPD, then BPDR can certainly assist you with resources, peer support and focus on healthy, happy living."

So I'd say the label isn't so much to worry over as an acknowledgment that those things you answered in reference to the DSM criteria are problematic for you. In any case, this community is a great source of information, tools, and support.


~ jr


:shysmile Oh, and may I scold you for missing doses of the Effexor? In my experience, not maintaining a prescribed status quo level of anti-depressants can put us in a tailspin - worse than not being medicated at all.

Thanks. I am not really bothered about labelling myself, I just want to get the right help. Like I said, the meds are helping a lot. I just feel that I have no-one to talk to in RL (real life).

I am on the waiting list for counselling, but I don't know how long that will take. My husbands never experienced anyone with depression or mental health issues before, so it is hard for him to relate, but he does try and be supportive, my best friend has BPD and I feel I can not burdern her with my problems, and I feel that doctors don't take me that seriously, just because I can act as if everything is normal, hold down a job etc.

Sweetersong, I think I have had the same problem. I always used to feel that my doctors/therapists didn't know how bad I really felt because I "acted normal." It's up to you to talk to them and communicate with them. Tell them how you're really feeling. I was able to hold down jobs and do other things. I used to get frustrated because I didn't think the doctors took me seriously. But I finally found a good therapist and I try very hard to communicate with him and let him know exactly what's going on. As I said - it's up to you. I used to think I had to act out for them to know how I really felt. But that's not true - you don't have to act out for them to know how bad you feel. So just make sure you keep the lines of communication open.

I'm having a hard time with the question because I'm not seeing how they are similar. They are two different things.

Although, I'm thinking the question really is, what's the difference between a depressed person and one with BPD. A slightly different question.

And the first part of the answer is, sometimes nothing at all. Sometimes the person with depression and the person with BPD are one and the same.

A person isn't a diagnosis. A person can have both depression (in it's varying degrees) and BPD or BPD traits.

Depression is a mood disorder. It related specifically to mood. It's being down all the time.

BPD is a pattern in a person's thinking and behavior.

One can have either or both or neither.

My diagnosis was depression, but I had a lot of the symptoms of BPD too (self-harm, other self-destructive behaviours, not really knowing who I was, etc). The difference between me and someone with BPD is that most of those symptoms were only there when I was depressed. However, I was still helped by approaches aimed at people with BPD (this site, DBT, etc) in addition to treatment for depression.

This is what the DSM has to say on the matter:

In other words, episodes of depression or mania can look like BPD, but BPD should only be diagnosed as well if it's a long-standing pattern of behaviour.

Of course, if you've had chronic depression from a young age then it can be hard to tell the difference! I'm sure my doctors thought I had BPD at one point - they didn't tell me that, but made comments about self-harm being part of my personality, and that I would always have mental health problems (which isn't true of BPD either, but some doctors still believe it is). When I responded to antidepressants and stopped self-destructing, I think they changed their minds.

Thanks for that, I am not sure really whether my traits are just in depressive times or not, as they do always seem to be there. But like I said the dx itself isn't an issue, as long as I get the treatment I need.

I really hope my counselling works for me, as that is what I am pinning my hopes on.

Good luck with counseling! I think you will get out of it what you put into it. And I hope you'll continue to post here!!!!

There are so many views on the whole depression vs BPD DX. The way I understand it is that BPD is more behavioral and depression is more chemical. Both include many of the same symptoms. I was Dxed with both until just recentally when I started seeing a new pdoc. She agrees that I have an anxiety disorder. However, she does not believe in BPD. She actually thinks I am bipolar. Which is a DX I have never, ever had. I am primarlly depressed. Although, I have imense periods of irritability, anger and self-injury. I do become attached to people very easily and always fear being left behind... two common characteristics of BPD that do not fit in the Bipolar DX. I have decided that the DX does not matter as long as the symptoms are being treated.
It does sound to me like you have some BPD symptoms. So, use this board and the tools at the left of your screen to help you deal with your MI. If you would like I am willing to discuss this further through PMing.
Juju