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You replied to the 2nd sentence, but the first sentence, which you didn't comment on, was the main point.

It's Me that all this talk is about, havve to say... it's strange seeing all of this up on a thread on the net, but it's great that Alfe is getting this off his chest. I'm trying my best to work on this I really am. Today though, I feel really awful. I just want to be away from everything, bu myself on a desert island or something. This feeling hits me in waves, I will suddenly think ... I want to be away from everthing, even thought about just moving or running away somewhere, but I know that won't solve any of my problems. I feel sad and restless I sometimes just don't get it at all, this life is crazy. I do bad things I lie, I am very unfair to people, but I'm not a bad person, sorry for rambling. Just feel really bad today need to get this off my chest... sorry if it makes no sense,

Thanks for listening

if its ok, i will go to the island with you and we each can have half?

i so understand the wanting to run and change my identity.

""""I do bad things I lie, I am very unfair to people, but I'm not a bad person""" that one sentence really struck me, esp the "but im not a bad person"> seems i spend most of my time trying to get someone to see that also. i dont usually lie nor do i think im too unfair, who knows, but the rest, hell yes.

must be weird seeing a thread about you....i dont know how i would handle it. my first instinct would be defensive and ready to fight. i admire yours wasnt.

hang in there, girl. good to meet you.

good to meet you all. it's great to finally be connected with other people who know exactly what it's like to be Me. In the past i would have been defensive, but, hey, what's the point?? everything Alfe said is true and i have to face up to me and accept this. I am working really hard to get this under control and today I feel good which is great. i just need to keep focused and keep learning more about me. i need to start working on my story and starting the steps. acceptance is a huge issue with me, i am only accepting recently that i have a mental health problem and i only accept now that i ahave a drink problem. my bpd is by far the most harmful thing in my life now. i'm just going to work really hard to learn how to live with it,

thank you for the post, thanks alfe you're the kindest most caring person in the world thank you for introducing me to these boards, it's invaluable

Hi all,

Just wanted to update and ask your advice again if I may!

Things have been going good, very good lately, for both of us. I am seeing a counsellor and she has been to some sessions, but more than that she is coming to me with things she normally would have kept to herself. And she is working through the steps and talking about bad things, I am getting braver with calling her on things she shouldnt say to me.

Therapy wise, she linked in with a woman who in my opinion was very bad for her. She hit on her weight in one session and suggested taking an intelligence test (I'm trying not to get involved but the things she was saying were just strange)

We talked about how she had taken CBT when she was 17, and has gotten back into using the guidelines from this site and it seems to work well. we cant afford regular sessions in terms of money or time, so I am happy to keep going as we are.

Thanks for all your suggestions again, I am hopeful

good luck alfe. im glad to hear your update. thanks for sharing!

sometimes we have to just make the time, as its soooo important for our health. if you had cancer, you would find the time for chemo, no?

money, you might check into your community for family services. my daughter and i both get free counseling at ours. and the counselors are excellent, much better than the private ones.

keep up the good work. hang in there! it is a long road....but well worth it. jody