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 Post subject: a super high-functioning BPD with internal turmoil....
PostPosted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 8:01 pm 
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Joined: Wed Jul 02, 2008 10:59 am
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Hi,

I have come to this site by recommendation from my husband whom confronted me a few nights ago with the BPD diagnosis....Initially, I was of course shocked and upset; but now, after reading stories that play like bits of my internal emotional rollercoaster life, I believe I, at minimum, have BPD traits.

I am from a childhood with a likely high functioning uBPD whom has controlled my mother their entire married life (42 yrs....). I have always had to stand up for her against my father and have become her protector which of course was impossible. I am still angry, frustrated, even acting out in BPD ways at my mom for not standing up for herself....

I have always known that I have had relationship issues and was a serial monogamous since age 16 until age 31 when I got married. My relationships premarriage were always tumultuous, mostly with me treating the partner poorly, knowing that this would ultimately end in a breakup (mostly by my own design).

I sought counselling with two psychiatrists for 3 yrs during my late 20's and prior to getting married whom were not able to detect the BPD traits. They always reassured me I was normal and had simple stressors and baseline insecurity. I have thought at times that I had bipolar but they also reassured me that this was not the case.

Now here I am, 5 yrs into a marriage and with 2 young children trying to keep it together. I am high functioning and have a significant in depth background in psychiatric training and still didn't recognize myself as having this entity....

I have scheduled to start working with a counselor. To those on this website with BPD and are on a clear path to recovery, what has been the most helpful to you?

Eager to get started on my family's healing path....


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 Post subject: Re: a super high-functioning BPD with internal turmoil....
PostPosted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 8:04 pm 
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Joined: Mon Dec 05, 2005 6:00 pm
Posts: 319
Quote:
To those on this website with BPD and are on a clear path to recovery, what has been the most helpful to you?
CBT tools like Dialectical Behavior Therapy and the tools on this site (look on the left side of this page).

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A great deal of intelligence can be invested in ignorance when the need for illusion is deep. ~Saul Bellow


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