Home  •  FAQ  •   Forums

It is currently Thu Mar 28, 2024 3:24 am

All times are UTC - 7 hours [ DST ]




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 7 posts ] 
Author Message
 Post subject: learning and trying interpersonal effectiveness
PostPosted: Fri May 01, 2009 1:04 pm 
New Member
New Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Sep 24, 2007 6:00 pm
Posts: 150
has anyone seen that workbook that is the DBT skills training manual? its black and red. well I bought it today because my T has it and instead of me having to just sit and listen to him read the handouts, i can follow along and then I have the worksheets to practice at home.

i have been working on interpersonal effectivenss but its hard. I find that my T says I am judging a lot even though I sincerely don't mean to. that does bother me though. I try to be open minded person and not judge people but I guess without realizing it, I do. My T says it is hard to not judge.

I was just curious about what others thought about practicing the skills and stuff. I was about to lose my T because of my interpersonal effectivenss issues but now he sees me working on this everyday practically.

Roo

_________________
Just because I made a mistake doesn't mean I AM a mistake


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: learning and trying interpersonal effectiveness
PostPosted: Fri May 01, 2009 7:47 pm 
New Member
New Member
User avatar

Joined: Sat Mar 28, 2009 6:22 am
Posts: 310
Location: New York, USA
hi roo-d-bear

i don't know the book you're talking about....but i do know about judging others and how it interferes with building relationships! i've done it....i've been the victim of it....and i think it's really really common.

nevertheless....it stops you from really being able to connect with the other person. i think the best place to work here would be to check out the 4 agreements....which has to do with not making assumptions about other people. When you judge you are making an assumption that you understand the person.

it's really hard not to judge others and i think it's something that just takes time and practice to get good at.

i hope that's helpful for you.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: learning and trying interpersonal effectiveness
PostPosted: Sat May 02, 2009 6:05 am 
New Member
New Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Sep 24, 2007 6:00 pm
Posts: 150
Thank you Skiotter. I will go check it out. the book is a DBT skills training manual that a lot of DBT therapists get, but I decided to get it to so i could follow along better with my T in our individual sessions.

_________________
Just because I made a mistake doesn't mean I AM a mistake


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: learning and trying interpersonal effectiveness
PostPosted: Sun May 03, 2009 6:48 am 
New Member
New Member
User avatar

Joined: Fri May 26, 2006 6:00 pm
Posts: 33
Hi, Roo, I also have the DBT workbook, and I don't know what I would do without being able to refer to the worksheets. I have a problem with forgetting things if I can't be visually reminded of them (like I can never put away an unpaid bill because I'll never think of it again!)... so having the book to review is extremely helpful.
I've been through DBT classes twice and both times struggled most with interpersonal effectiveness module. I can really relate to your issue of not being able to ask for what you want.. this is a theme for many of my T sessions.
Keep up the review of the printed material and making the "experiments" like talking to your hairdresser; I'm sure the reinforcement will be positive for you.
I'm really interested in hearing how you do with this, and how you use the workbook in your processing of things.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: learning and trying interpersonal effectiveness
PostPosted: Sun May 03, 2009 8:23 am 
New Member
New Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Sep 24, 2007 6:00 pm
Posts: 150
Thanks Medusa! well yesterday i was able to ask for something. here's a brief background.......i have what is called autonomic neuropathy because of diabetes. what it means is that some nerves to my heart and other systems that are autmatic (we dont' think about breathing etc) are damaged. so i start sweating and my heart starts racing when i stand for too long. so we went to a new super walmart yesterday where i knew no one and didn't know where anything was. my husband tried to find me a scooter but none could be found. so i walked around shopping but I was really uncomfortable. then my husband found one! so off to shopping i went! some of the items i needed were too high or i couldnt' get the scooter close enough to the shelves because of all the people! so my mom was with us and my husband was getting a hair cut (he usually gets things for me that i can't reach from the scooter). i went to look for an item and my mom couldn't get around the people either. a nice lady saw me and offered to help me get the item! I know i didn't come right out and ask but she saw me struggle and she offered! I was very thankful. but I did ask a customer service person where some items were that we could not locate. it was really pretty easy. so i tried it at least! LOL.

i really have to get my head around not judging things though too. i don't mean to judge. that's not my intentions. but it happens. thanks for writing!

Roo

_________________
Just because I made a mistake doesn't mean I AM a mistake


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: learning and trying interpersonal effectiveness
PostPosted: Tue May 05, 2009 10:10 pm 
New Member
New Member

Joined: Sun Oct 26, 2008 1:13 pm
Posts: 44
I've also found the manual to be helpful, many of the handouts can also be found on dbtselfhelp.com


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: learning and trying interpersonal effectiveness
PostPosted: Wed May 06, 2009 2:53 am 
New Member
New Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Sep 24, 2007 6:00 pm
Posts: 150
this is great to know! thanks everyone!

Roo

_________________
Just because I made a mistake doesn't mean I AM a mistake


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 7 posts ] 

All times are UTC - 7 hours [ DST ]


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 25 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum

Jump to:  
cron
Powered by phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group