BPDRecovery.com: Forums

Tracy, rambling is in the eye of the beholder. and screw that, right.

your doing great. this is what i love when i work on something in public, is others go with it, apply it to themselves and proceed to work it out also. FANTASTIC. we all work together! nothing negative, just good hard learning. ah, im grateful.

look up emotional blackmail when you can for a refresher course. i need those occasionally..lol...like every day right.

it is the coldest, cruelest shit in the world to manipulate another. and using a child is a key thing.

i hate it, i pity the people who use it and need it. its so hard to handle.

im angry just knowing he is trying this shit with you and your kid.

and its all so intertwined...it all comes together as all kinds of stuff.

the thing to remember , so many forget, boundaries are not meant to change another. they are a fence around US, not another. so many get angry--"he crossed my boundary!" well doh, thats why their there. for us when it is crossed. some may be intentional, some may be untintentional, but none matter because we have things in place for just that! (hopefully lol)

i like how your handling it with your son. you know my granddaughter who is 9 now? she is now in counseling for depression and ODD. lovely eh. im surprised she didnt start this way back. her sperm donor does the same thing...uses her as a pawn. im sad he feels he NEEDS a pawn. what a jerk. why do they always hurt the kids? sighs. we will help her thru this. and him. they will be stronger for this.

i think you were spot on the point.

((Tracy)) great work.

ODD? Is that Oppositional defiance disorder? I have one of those too if so.
I am trialling omega three and vitamin E. I wont go the ritalin approach just yet! Like the terrible twos in an older child. Tough stuff! (sorry off topic again!)

yes, oppositional defiance disorder. hoping to catch this early. she has always seen this with her father, the throwing shit and screaming, but with my daughters bi polar this kid has had it from both sides. my daughter has finally , God willing, seen her actions are important for these kids and can hurt them.

i am telling her things like i see your angry. its ok but we have to be careful how we express it. if you let her alone, she will come out of it herself in a few mins so far. she has just had too much crisis in her young life to be able to handle it.

she has a wonderful 2 counselors, one is mine and one is my daughters and i think it will go well--just a long struggle.

i had forgotten you have one with it too! lets share sometime, if you have any good tips for us. bless these kids hearts...its all they know to do when they feel so helpless.


we will not go any meds unless forced by her own behaviors. seen what they could do when my daughter was young. no thanks. she isnt ADHD tho. just so angry at life, i think. and depressed in a way. i do trust these counselors and that is a huge help. my daughter is afraid she is showing bipolar but i told her, no way, she isnt. neither kid looks to be bipolar. thank God.
((tracy))

Jody, yes, there are situations you cannot change. And you can't control how people feel. But you can change how you react to situations. That's the big eye-opener! Of course it's real easy for me to type it here - it's another to practice it in my every-day life. But at least I'm aware of the concept. That's more than I knew 5 or 10 or 20 years ago! The thing is - this is so much damned work! We have to work all the time. But the payoff is big!