Home  •  FAQ  •   Forums

It is currently Sat Jun 23, 2018 1:38 pm

All times are UTC - 7 hours [ DST ]




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 1 post ] 
Author Message
 Post subject: Knowing what to radically accept
PostPosted: Tue May 25, 2010 8:19 am 
Community Member
Community Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Jan 14, 2008 6:00 pm
Posts: 991
Sometimes the hardest thing about radical acceptance is knowing what it is one needs to accept. It's kinda like the serenity prayer. "serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, wisdom to know the difference". But it's not just wisdom to know the difference. It's seeing something, and then applying that wisdom.

A certain someone I know, he's inconsistent in how friendly he is to me. Okay, that's his stuff. I accept it. I know it's not about me. It took a long time, though, to actually see that that is part of the dynamic in between us.

And before anyone gets the wrong idea, the inconsistency is between being friendly, versus ignoring me. There's no nastiness or abusiveness or anything like that. And it's not a significant other. So none of those sorts of issues.

It's also an issue of relationship boundaries. What's the nature of the relationship between us, and is his behavior, including the inconsistency, acceptable within that relationship. And the answer is yes. Though it's also a matter of what relationship I choose. Choosing a relationship that fits with what I get. Though that choice starts with accepting that he's inconsistent, and that's not something I can control.

_________________
Ellen K.


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 1 post ] 

All times are UTC - 7 hours [ DST ]


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum

Jump to:  
cron
Powered by phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group