(Trin, insert the appropriate soothing, empathetic words here. I feel like you won't object if I go straight to the problem-solving part. If, however, you're in the mood for the soothing & empathy, skip my post til you're ready for All That Is Ash! LOL)
Shift your perspective.
Sure, you're not getting the red carpet rolled out for the job of your dreams but if you shift your perspective into a place where you're preparping to create memories that you'll reflect back upon in forty years and describe this time as "one in which you are victorious over difficult circumstances and really roll up your sleeves and do whatever's necessary to get through 'the dark times'" I think you'll be in a better head-space.
In my darkest times, I have:
- worked the midnight shift at an airport at the cargo desk (shipping dead people & such)
- worked at a Dairy Queen
- worked the midnight shift at a convenience store (midnight shift jobs are easy to get cuz no one wants them)
- scrubbed toilets for teenage boys in a house of three small un-house-trained dogs
- did data entry at an insurance company (can you say ZZZZZZZZZZZZZ?!)
- sold cheap knock-off fake perfume door-to-door
- did HTML tagging and desktop publishing (which was mind-numbingly boring)
At some places, I was only getting $6 an hour - or if I was lucky & it was a midnight shift, $8/hr.
Did I think scrubbing toilets was beneath my intelligence and what I had to offer the world? You bet your ass, I did! But I did it all anyway - just to keep money coming in and now, looking back, I'm proud of myself for not ending up living in a cardboard box. Ya know?
It might not be glamorous but there are ways to make money and if you can shift your perspective a little bit, it's not all that bad. (When I scrubbed toilets for five hours a day, I also worked out two hours a day and I was in the absolute best shape of my life!)
Not all sickness means death.
Shoot - I recently read something that was wonderful and inspirational but now I can't find it. I think it was at Peanut but now I can't find it anywhere. Something about how "if it feels like the end, it can't be the end."