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 Post subject: Not really sure where to post this....
PostPosted: Sat Mar 27, 2010 12:28 pm 
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Joined: Fri Feb 19, 2010 9:40 pm
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But I just really need some words of advice or something...

Okay so here's the deal. I have been staying with relatives in Mississippi, and there's a LOT of negativity here. My aunt is insane and screams all the time and then turns around and somehow makes me trust her again only to stamp on me and jab the knife in and twist it all over again.

I am engaged to a wonderful guy, however he did just loose his mother, to BPD... she killed herself because she couldn't take it anymore, so he's extremely fragile right now.

Being in such a negative household is really taking a toll on me, and it's becoming very hard on him. I think he's afraid I'll go the same way his mother did. He says he can't take it, but he isn't going to leave me.

I do have a plane ticket to get out of here, but it isn't until May 10th, because my cousin is getting married and her wedding is on May 4th, I promised her I'd be there for it.

I just feel like I'm losing my mind. My fiance is completely wonderful and I keep trying to remind myself he's really not gonna leave me. The thing that gets me worried is that he's in England, and I get scared he'll get fed up with me and find someone who's actually there. A friend of his added me on Facebook, and the other day he was with her, and she posted her status as "so inlove with him" or something to that effect, so I innocently asked who and she said "That would be tellin.." or something... am I completely insane for having worries?

Part of me knows he'd never cheat on me, but this other part in my head wont shut up about it and I feel like I'm losing it....

 Post subject: Re: Not really sure where to post this....
PostPosted: Sun Apr 04, 2010 10:48 am 
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I'm sorry you're going thru a tough time. Being in an unhealthy home environment AND a long distance relationship is extremely taxing. You posted this in undo the twist... and I see huge twisties in the relationship department. The family stuff I see falling along the lines of separation of stuff. I know if I were in your situation, I'd have a hard time dealing with a long distance relationship before you can figure out how to make your home life livable.

You only mention your aunt. Is there any other relative there that can help you find balance? How can you minimize the mental damage your aunt is doing. Caring about a relative is one thing. Being repeatedly hurt by someone and returning for more is another. How can you protect yourself?

As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live. -- Goethe

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