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 Post subject: Hi I'm New Here
PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2011 12:40 pm 
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Joined: Fri Dec 30, 2011 12:27 pm
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Hi,
I was raised by a borderline Queen-Witch narcissistic mother. I think I have waif-traits. I've had depression for a very long time. I am currently (finally) in therapy with someone who actually understands BPD and isn't afraid of it.

What is confusing me a lot, is there seems to be huge differences in the types of borderlines, yet everything I read online clumps them all together. This is where I'm struggling a lot. My mother was an abusive, cruel, mean, controlling woman. She definitely has BPD. I am absolutely nothing like her. Yet here I am with BPD traits. This doesn't make any sense to me.

I guess what I would like most out of this forum, is how to help myself. I am caught again in the black hole of depression, and despite my working hard at therapy, I can barely get out of bed in the morning and I cannot seem to help myself even though I desperately want to get better. It's a very frustrating catch-22.

I get overwhelmed easily and lost in the sea of information in sites like this, so if someone could also point me to the right places, based on what I've shared here, I'd appreciate that. Thanks in advance.

One last question: when therapists say that they cannot stand treating BPD patients, are they talking about the Queen, Witch, Hermit, or Waif--or all of the above? My therapist said that Queens/Witches do not go to therapy. So then I'm assuming they don't like treating Waifs/Hermits. Can someone please explain this? Why wouldn't a therapist/psychologist want to help someone who is going to therapy in the first place, in order to help themselves??


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 Post subject: Re: Hi I'm New Here
PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2011 6:18 pm 
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Joined: Mon Aug 22, 2005 6:00 pm
Posts: 1613
Location: The Carolinas
Welcome Shades!

BPD is like a rainbow. The diagnostic criteria actually can break down into 256 "types" of BPD. So those folks who lump us all together are actually thinking in a borderline manner... kinda black and white.

I read the book the Borderline Mother. I think it's a great book up to a certain point. When we get hung up on labels, I think we can end up wasting time. If you've figured out the behaviors that make you unhappy and know that you want to change, labels aren't necessary (in my opinion).

I hope you take a look around and check out the tools we offer on the site. And we're here to listen!

Once again, welcome!

Trinity

_________________
As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live. -- Goethe


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 Post subject: Re: Hi I'm New Here
PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2011 10:00 am 
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Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 6:12 pm
Posts: 819
Location: sarasota
Hi Shades,

Welcome to you. Try not to worry too much about the "technical" details of your diagnosis. I'm sure you will find people here who share your feelings and thought processes and try to help you with anything you feel is not helping you to function in the way you would like.

dagwood


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